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Pull the Plug - Why are Two Brothers Fighting Over Their Mother’s Life?

January 30, 2020
David Parker, Esq.
An elder law attorney can help with paying for a nursing home
David Parker, White Plains and New City NY Estate Planning Attorney
David Parker, Esq.
David Parker is an attorney who specializes in Estate Planning and Elder Law and has been practicing law for 30 years. Be it Wills, Trusts, Powers of Attorney, Health Care Proxies, or Medicaid Planning, David provides comprehensive and caring counsel for seniors and their families. A large portion of David’s practice is asset protection strategies so that families do not lose their hard earned savings to nursing home care costs. He also handles probate administration for the settlement of estates.
She can only mouth words and nod her head, but a bed-bound, 91-year-old Long Island woman has made herself clear — she does not want to be taken off the machines that keep her alive.

An elderly mom is at the center of a court battle between her two sons. Her eldest son is set to face off against his brother in Nassau County Court, arguing he wants to keep their mother on a ventilator and feeding tube, while his sibling wants to pull the plug.

The New York Post’s recent article entitled “91-year-old LI woman mouths ‘I want to live’ on video amid legal battle” reports that the older brother, Edward, submitted the video he says was taken in November. It shows their mother even mouthing the words, “I want to live.’’

The mom, Arline, has been physically incapacitated, since suffering a string of circulation and breathing problems over the past year, Edward said. His brother, Kyle, asked a judge to declare him her sole guardian, noting that he hopes to take her off life support. However, he contends that this is what their mom would want.

Kyle accuses Edward of keeping their mom alive against her will, so he can stay in her Long Beach home and “plunder” her assets, including the total $5,400 she collects every month from Social Security and her pension. Kyle requested that the hospital take Arline off life support pursuant to her 1999 living will, in which she’d asked not to be kept alive by machines and have her proxy pull the plug, if she ever became seriously ill.

Edward says that his mother clearly changed her mind and denies he has a financial stake in keeping his her alive. In fact, if her health improves enough that she can be moved from the hospital into a nursing home, as he hopes, her income and estate (and both sons’ inheritance) worth approximately a quarter million dollars to each of them, will soon be eaten up by nursing-home costs, Edward argues. Edward says that he gave up his career in Colorado as a mortgage and real-estate broker to come back to New York to care for her.

In his mother’s “I want to live” video, filmed in November from her hospital bed, Edward asks Arline, “You have no leg, right?” referring to a recent amputation of her left leg due to circulatory problems. She nods yes.

“You understand that?” he asks.

Again, she nods yes.

“You have a feeding tube in you, you understand that, right? You have a tracheotomy and you have the thing breathing for you?” Edward asks his mom.

His mother nods yes, each time.

Edward then urges her to mouth the words, “I want to stay alive,’’ just to be absolutely clear. She does.

“With everything wrong with you, do you still want to stay alive?” he asks again, gently.

Yes, she nods.

A week after the video was taped, she executed a living will, with the help of an elder law lawyer, that states, “I wish to be treated aggressively for all conditions” and directs doctors “to continue to prolong my life as long as possible, within the limits of generally acceptable health care standards.”

Edward said that the hospital staff conducted a competency hearing administered by a psychiatrist, and she was determined to be competent. He insists that there’s still a chance their mother’s health will improve.

Reference: New York Post (Jan. 5, 2020) “91-year-old LI woman mouths ‘I want to live’ on video amid legal battle”

Suggested Key Terms: Elder Law Attorney, Living Will, Elder Care, Capacity, Will, Inheritance

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